Chapter 99: Let You Suffer a Thousand Arrows Through the Heart

“Hey—did you guys hear that noise?”

Pei Yu stood atop a large boulder, craning his neck to peer over the other side of the hill. He called down excitedly to Yuan An and the others below.

Yuan An, busy pulling up weeds, didn’t even look up, just kept working away with intense focus.

Pei Yu was not pleased. He withdrew his gaze, squatted down, and peered at the people below the rock. “Hey, hey, little fatty, I’m talking to you! Why aren’t you answering? Don’t tell me your ears are broken? That’d be a problem—I’ve been to the pharmacy workshop a couple times and never seen any medicine for ear problems!”

Pei Yu’s mouth was running a mile a minute above, chattering nonstop. Below, Yuan An let out a silent wail, his chubby face full of regret.

Letting Pei Yu stay in his little cabin was, without a doubt, the most regrettable decision of his life.

Not only was Pei Yu’s sense of style an eyesore, but he was also a troublemaker. He refused to leave the bathroom unless he’d bathed for at least an hour every day. Yuan An had thought that, after the system announced it was going to start charging for water, Pei Yu would rein it in a bit—water wasn’t cheap, after all.

But nope. The guy did cut back—by a whole ten minutes. He still spent fifty minutes in the bathroom, as if he wasn’t worried about scrubbing his own skin off.

And the worst part? He was shameless enough to try to make Yuan An pay the water bill, just because he was the elder. Ugh. Yuan An couldn’t take this injustice.

Fine, if he says my ears are broken, then my ears are broken.

Yuan An shifted around, turning his back to Pei Yu as he continued weeding, presenting his backside in silent protest.

Pei Yu scratched his dashing face in confusion. “What’s up with this kid? Why’s he ignoring me and giving me his butt? Hmph, so rude.”

He grumbled indignantly.

This guy really had no self-awareness at all.

Wu Xingyu rolled his eyes at him. “Get down here and help.”

Pei Yu’s face stiffened. He awkwardly stuffed his hands in his pockets and muttered, “Help with what? I already told you, these are just weeds. Sure, they’re a bit special, growing all green and tender in the snow, but with your luck, how could you possibly find anything good? I’m telling you, these are definitely just ordinary weeds.”

Mo Xie, who was crouched down examining the grass, froze. His gaze darkened as he stared at the lush, soft green blades in front of him. Could they really be just ordinary weeds?

Thinking of his nephew’s infamous bad luck, he pressed his lips together in silence.

A tic mark popped up on Wu Xingyu’s forehead, his face turning ugly. This fat Pei always knew exactly how to push his buttons. Perfect.

Yuan An tugged Yun He aside just in time, as a half-grown, chubby kid in long robes—looking like he’d just stepped off an opera stage—came crashing down from above.

Pei Yu landed headfirst in the snow, legs sticking up like a green onion planted upside down. The cold shot through his body, and his face got an up-close-and-personal kiss from the snow. In an instant, his chubby cheeks turned blue from the cold.

“Ah! I’m freezing to death! You little brat, you’re trying to murder your own uncle!”

Pei Yu scrambled up from the snow, stomping and yelling at Wu Xingyu.

But in his flailing, he accidentally kicked off his shoe, and the button on his padded jacket popped off, thanks to his jiggling belly.

The shouting stopped abruptly.

Four pairs of eyes stared at him.

The scene was awkwardly silent for a moment.

“Pfft—” Yuan An couldn’t hold back his laughter. His eyes sparkled mischievously as he looked Pei Yu up and down, then snickered, “So Third Brother wasn’t lying—Uncle Pei really is fat after all, even fatter than me!”

Pei Yu: …That hurts, little fatty!

He hurriedly covered his belly with both hands, his so-called enchanting peach blossom eyes—eyes he thought could make any noble lady swoon—were completely swallowed up by his fat. His doughy face, frozen in shock, looked utterly ridiculous.

At this moment, Pei Yu was the very picture of a country bumpkin: short, fat, and round.

Now that he had broad shoulders, a slim waist, and long legs, he considered this chubby phase the shame of his life—a black history he never wanted anyone to mention again.

Normally, as long as he kept this dark past under wraps and denied it with all his might, no one would ever know. But the problem was, he just couldn’t keep his mouth shut and had to provoke Wu Xingyu, who could send him back to his “fat and round” days at any time with his time powers.

Talk about bad luck. His chubby form was now exposed, making a “grand” entrance.

Surprised? Shocked?

Pei Yu was so “delighted” he almost dug himself a snow pit to hide in.

Wu Xingyu let out a cold laugh, his eyes glinting dangerously.

If you dare stab me in the heart, I’ll make sure you suffer a thousand arrows through yours.

Pei Yu immediately caved. “Xiao Yuyu, I—I know I was wrong. Please change me back.”

He squeezed his eyes open as wide as he could, forcing a flattering smile.

Wu Xingyu lifted his chin with disdain, looking down at him. “What did you do wrong?”

Pei Yu’s little eyes darted nervously. He ventured, “I—I shouldn’t have made fun of your bad luck?”

“And?”

“My mouth is foul, I had it coming, I brought this on myself.”

Wow, he’s pretty good at roasting himself too.

Wu Xingyu’s expression softened a little. He glanced at Pei Yu with his dark eyes. “Hmph. Since you’re sincerely admitting your mistake, I’ll let you off this time. But if it happens again, I’ll turn you back into your fat and round self right in the middle of Earth Village Square.”

Pei Yu: …

His fat jiggled in fear. Forcing a smile, he said, “I wouldn’t dare.”

Yuan An grinned from ear to ear, feeling a sense of sweet revenge.

He quickly called out happily, “Uncle Pei, come help us pull weeds! Once we clear this patch, that area over there is all yours.”

Pei Yu, who had just changed back and was putting on his shoes, looked over in the direction Yuan An pointed.

Whoa, that’s a huge patch—almost an acre!

He looked troubled, not daring to meet his fierce nephew’s gaze, and pitifully turned to his cousin.

“Cousin, you grow a lot of orchids. Can you tell if these weeds are actually useful?”

Mo Xie cleared his throat, avoiding Pei Yu’s eyes. “You can take them home and feed them to the chickens.”

Pei Yu looked baffled, eyes full of confusion. “But we don’t have any chickens.”

Mo Xie shot him a “you idiot” look. “The Hu birds like to peck at green leaves. We can use the grass to lure them.”

Yuan An’s eyes lit up. “Great idea, Uncle Mo! That way, we won’t have to worry about competing with others.”

He hurried over to Pei Yu, grinning. “Uncle Pei, there’s no way you can clear that whole patch by yourself. Yun He and I will help you!”

With that, he and the equally excited Yun He scampered off to pull weeds, looking absolutely delighted.

Pei Yu watched their backs and snorted. These little brats and their friends were just as crafty—always quick to snatch up any benefits.

Not to be outdone, he finished putting on his shoes, jumped up, grabbed his padded jacket (now missing a button), and hurried after them, sticking his butt out and burying his head in the weeds."